There are times that we wish we had more control over other people. Sometimes, waiting for someone to get motivated can be frustrating and it can hold us back from getting what we need to get done. The irresponsible kid, the lazy spouse, or the unreliable friend are all examples of people who might need the motivation to become more responsible, energetic, or reliable. But, how can we persuade someone to get motivated? Following are three ways to persuade someone without yelling, screaming, or begging.
1. Create a Need For Them To Get Motivated
Many people will not attempt to do something unless they feel an absolute need to do it. However, once they feel that need or urgency, they quickly start taking action.
For instance, the husband who will not fix the toilet may consider doing it if his friends were coming over for a football game and they will need to use the bathroom. His friends create a need to fix it, and so his motivation kicks in.
Your job is to create that type of need. You may tell him about a one-time sale going on for the parts he needs. You could tell him that his mother has declared that surprise visits are something she would like to start doing. Anything that creates the need to get the job done will work and get him motivated to get busy.
2. Make Them Feel Motivated
Everyone feels good after accomplishing a task. It produces a high that lasts for quite a while and remains in the memory forever. Therefore, if you can recreate a good feeling from an accomplishment they have had, then you can literally help them to feel like a motivated person.
First, evoke a memory by reminding them about something they did well. Memories of pride will start to flood their mind, and a desire to feel like that will most likely follow.
Next, keep the memories going by telling them how great you thought they were when they finished that task. Using the husband as an example, you could bring up a moment where a home repair went really well, and how everyone complimented him and his abilities. The more you talk about what a great job he did, the more he will want to prove that he can do that again!
Lastly, mention the task that you want him to get motivated for right now, which will create a bond in his mind between that memory and this current task. He will start to think that this new task will be the perfect chance to prove, once again, that he does home repairs well.
3. Make The Positive Outcome Feel Real
Often, the action required is what holds back someone from getting motivated. Fixing the toilet, cleaning up a room, or doing the dishes, are not activities that anyone really looks forward to doing. However, if you can help someone feel the positive outcome from the boring action, then you may be able to motivate that person to take that action.
For instance, if your husband does not want to fix the toilet, but enjoys using the toilet that needs fixing because it’s private, then you can remind him how great it will be when the toilet is fixed and ready to use again for his privacy. Maybe you can throw his favorite magazines in there or add a few pieces of artwork that you know he would appreciate. The point is to make him want to be able to use the toilet again and take action towards fixing it.
In the end, the above three tactics are going to help to motivate someone much better than the usual tactics of yelling, screaming, or begging. As a bonus, using them correctly can cause the other person to feel as though they were the ones that decided to get motivated and you had nothing to do with it.